eloos...these are juz sum jokes that i found... remember that there are NO OFFENSE to anyone!!! i'm not offending anyone! juz to keep ur spirits high during the hols, here's "A Successful Smuggler" and "Issac Newton's rules" right here on the class blog:
A Successful Smuggler
Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He's got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Sand," answered Juan.
The guard says, "We'll just see about that - get off the bike!" The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.
The next day, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Sand," says Juan.
The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle.
This sequence of events is repeated every day for a year. Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard runs into him in a Cantina in Mexico.
"Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"
Juan sips his beer and says, "Bicycles."
haha...now on to the next joke:
Issac Newton's rule
Recently Isaac Newton, the Father of physics made a visit to earth to watch a movie. He watched a few Tamil movies and his head started spinning. He was convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything he had done.
In a movie starring Rajanikant, Newton was confused to such an extent that he went paranoid. Here are a few scenes from the movie he saw: 1) Rajanikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to the doctors can't be cured and his death is imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikant is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bulletpasses through his ears taking away the tumor along with it and he is cured.Long Live Rajanikant!!
2) In one of the movies, Rajanikant is confronted with 3 gangsters. Rajanikant has a gun but unfortunately only one bullet. Guess what he does....... He holds a knife in his hand and throws at the middle gangster…andshoots the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces and kills both the gangsterson each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
3) Rajanikant is chased by a gangster. Rajanikant has a revolver but he got no bullets in it. Guess what he does. Nah not even in your remotest imaginations. He waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikant opens the bullet compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet. Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires his gun. Bang... And the gangster dies....This was too much for the Great Newton to take, he was completely shaken and he decided to go back.But he was seing a movie after a long time and it was his last movie, and so he decided to watch till the end. The next hour of the movie goes ok and Newton is feeling happy that all in the world hasn't changed.Oops, not so fast.
The Climax finally arrives.Rajanikant gets to know that the villain is on the other side of a very high wall. So high that Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of those superman techniques that heroes normally use. Rajanikant hasto desperately kill the villain because it's the climax. (Newton is smiling since it is virtually impossible). Rajanikant suddenly pulls two guns from his pocket (Probably a backup). He throws one gun in the air and when the gun has reached the height of the wall, he shoots at the trigger of the first gun in air, with hissecond gun. The first gun fires off and the villain is dead. (Newton commits Suicide in the theatre.)
Remember, these are only to keep ur spirits up high...no offense to anyone in the class, no offense to any religion, no offense to any race...no offense to anyone!!! I juz wanna make this clear. coz i have been spat at becoz of a misunderstanding and that person didnt apologise.
so tata...
~+*wEiLiNg*+~
